Wesley

When I was a child, and by a child I mean in 7th grade, I had a really wonderfully imaginative best friend.

The two of us didn't really do much except for sit around and dream up the most magnificent futures full of garden parties, beautiful old houses in exotic locations, and the two best friends,James and Wesley

, who were going to fulfill the boyfriendly aspects of said lives.

Yes, we created imaginary boyfriends.

I am not embarrassed
{except for quite a bit, I really am}

Now that the facts are in the open:

Wesley is
mostly Holden Caulfield with a little less mental illness and a little more hopelessly in love with me.
He is a genius and doesn't know how to handle it, causing him to be socially awkward.
He can play the guitar like a mf riot
He looks slightly reminiscent of James Mcavoy
He is secretly hilarious
He wants to live anywhere but the U.S.

One time I was in an airport and over the intercom a lady announced, "Would Wesley and James please come to the desk located at gate 32D." My heart stopped. I wanted to drop everything and run as fast as I could to the desk located at gate 32D. But I couldn't because I had a plane to catch. Don't we all?

For me, that plane is N.
N. is my {real life} boyfriend. He is not Wesley, but he is everything I need. He is not particularly mysterious or hilarious or a genius, but he is truly, really, very much so what I need in this life. He has other-worldly wisdom, kindness and gentleness unmatched, the best and most sincere laugh, and a deep sense of humility.


Life never turns out the way you dreamed it might, but I don't think that is any good reason to quit dreaming. While part of me will always have a spot for Wesley, I'm glad he isn't real. N. is reality and it is good.


Now, I stumbled upon the picture this post starts off with. I saw it and just stared. That is him, that is Wesley.

Hello Wesley,

What we had was really magical. But I had this plane to catch and it's
taking me somewhere, to home. To a place I was created for, but have never
been before.
Please take care and send my love to James.

All the Best,
M.


What is a plane you had to catch? Or rather, what is a dream you moved past to experience good reality?